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The Best Man is the primary attendant for the groom (or the bride, depending on the preferences of the couple). Some grooms may choose to have more than one man if the bride chooses both a Matron and a Maid of Honor. However, some grooms do not have honor attendants at all and split the duties of the Best Man amongst the groomsmen or other attendants.
- For information on attire for the Best Man, please visit the attire page.
Traditional Duties of the Best Man
Pre-Wedding Showers
The Best Man should be the contact point for planning and scheduling of any pre-wedding parties thrown for the groom and be in attendance at each one. Should partygoers bring gifts, he should keep list of gifts and givers to assist the couple in writing thank-you cards. If the couple is having a joint shower, the Best Man should work in tandem with the Maid/Matron of Honor as well.
More and more couples are having the Best Man plan and serve as the host for the engagement party. The Best Man may also enlist the help of the Maid/Matron of honor or the parents of the couple.
The Bachelor Party
Just as the Maid/Matron of Honor is responsible for planning the bachelorette party, the Best Man is responsible for the bachelor party. The Best Man generally gets ideas for the party from the other groomsmen and the groom himself, though the details of the party are traditionally a surprise to the groom. While some grooms may enjoy a night of parties and rowdy activities, other grooms may prefer a simple evening out with friends. For more information on planning the bachelor party, see the Bachelor party page.
Toasts
Traditionally, the Best Man gives the first toast at the reception. This toast may include ancedotes about the couple, amusing stories about the couple, heartwarming wishes for the newlyweds, or other sentiments for the couple. The Best Man may also give a toast at the Rehearsal dinner and the Engagement party.
Traditional Ceremonial Duties
During the wedding ceremony, the Best Man is in charge of:
- Transporting the groom to the ceremony site
- Holding the bride's ring
- Standing with the groom
- Assisting the Maid/Matron of Honor with movement of chairs or other materials during the ceremony.
- Directing readers, ushers, and/or groomsmen if necessary
- Make sure the elements of the ceremony run smoothly
Other Culturally-Specific Duties
In some cultures, the Best Man may also serve as a stand-in groom at the wedding rehearsal. The Best Man may also do various things to help prepare the groom on his wedding day. In Jewish weddings, the Best Man usually serves as a witness under the Chupah. In order to do this, he must be kosher and not related to the bride or groom in any way. He will then also escort the couple to their Yichud immediately following the ceremony.
Traditional Wedding Reception Duties
During the wedding reception, the Best Man traditionally does the following:
- Acts as Master of Ceremonies unless this is being done by the DJ
- Helps direct the guests to various activities
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