Rose ceremony

Overview

There are several rose/flower ceremonies. They involve the bride, groom, and sometimes other family members giving flowers, usually roses, to one another. The unity candle ceremony, the hands ceremony, and the sand ceremony are similar to the rose ceremony and be either be performed alone or with the rose ceremony.

History

The rose ceremony is believed to originated in the Roman Empire, especially within Rome itself. Flowers, symbolizing rebirth, love, beauty and fertility, have always been an essential part of the wedding ceremonies. It continued to be a popular aspect of the wedding in Europe and is becoming more and more popular in the United States, especially with more secular weddings.

This ceremony is also part of the greater ritual of handfasting. As it originated among ancient pagans, neopagan religions, such as Wicca and Ásatrú, continue this legacy, but as handfasting has also been secularized over time, it is not unusual to see non-pagans use handfasting or rose ceremonies.

The Ceremony

A modern-day rose/flower ceremony is comprised of the declaration of symbolism and the exchange of flowers. The most traditional way is for two red roses to be used: one for each member of the couple. It usually occurs after the exchange of rings and before the pronouncement of marriage. There are many variations of the rose ceremony depending on the preference of the couple. Some involve candles with roses, hence intertwining the unity candle and the rose ceremonies. Some involve the families of the couple, while others use it as a family unity ceremony.

Traditional Rose Ceremony

This is the more traditional of the rose ceremonies. In it, the couple each has one red rose. They then swap roses, generally in the process saying something meaningful to one another (or having the officiant say something meaningful). Once roses are exchanged the couple may hold on to the roses, place them on an altar together, or hand them to an attendant. The words exchanged can be a simple "I love you" or elaborate vows written by the couple. Below are some examples.

Ceremony Wording

Simple Ceremony

Officiant: (names of the couple) will exchange roses to symbolize the giving of their love and their lives to one another.

Bride/Groom: With this rose, I give you my heart. I give you my eternal love, fidelity, and trust. (Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

(The other member of the couple repeats the words and actions.)

Officiant: Now that the couple has given themselves through vow and symbol, I now pronounce them...

Ceremony With Vows

Officiant: (names of the couple) will exchange roses to symbolize the love they share with each other.

Bride/Groom: This rose is my promise to you. I promise to be faithful to you, to love you unconditionally, to be supportive in every way, and to cherish you as my husband/wife. (Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

(Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

(The other member of the couple repeats the words and actions.)

Ceremony With A Reading

Officiant: The couple would now like to pledge themselves to one another through the exchange of roses.

Bride/Groom: While no words can truly express the depth of my love, I would like to read a (poem/passage/verse/text) describing our love. (Reads the poem/passage/verse/text) I give you this rose as a symbol of our love and the committment we are making to each other today. (Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

or

Bride/Groom: This rose is a symbol of our love and our bond. I would like to read something that also expresses the love I have for you. (Reads the poem/passage/verse/text) (Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

or

Bride/Groom: (Reads the poem/passage/verse/text) With this rose, I pledge to you my heart and my life. (Gives the rose to the groom/bride)

Rose Ceremony For Parents

Some couples use the rose ceremony as a way to honor their parents, usually the mothers. These may be very short ceremonies put somewhere in the wedding ceremony- usually near the beginning of the ceremony. During this, the couple will hand single roses to their parents. Some couples prefer just the bride to hand out these flowers, while some will have the flower girl hand out the flowers. Regardless of the specifics, it is a nice way to honor the parents.

Ceremony Wording

Simple Ceremony

Officiant: (names of the couple) will present roses to their mothers. The roses symbolize the love and respect they have for the women who raised them.

or

Officiant: (names of the couple) wish now to honor their mothers through the presentation of roses.

or

Officiant: By presenting their parents with roses, (names of the couple) wish to honor their heritage and thank their families for their love and support.

Ceremony With A Reading

Officiant: (names of the couple) wish to honor their parents with a reading and the presentation of roses.

Bride/Groom: (Reads the poem/passage/verse/text) I give you this rose as a token of my love and gratitude. (Gives the rose to his/her parent or parents)

or

Officiant: The couple now wishes to honor their parents with a reading and a token of gratitude

Bride/Groom: I present to you a rose to thank you for all the love and support you have given me throughout my life. (Reads the poem/passage/verse/text) (Gives the rose to his/her parent or parents)

Rose Ceremony with Children

A rose ceremony may also include the children of the bride and the groom. Each child gets a red rose like the [bride] and [groom] do.

Setting up for a ceremony

Depending on how the flower exchange will take place, you may need to give flowers to various participants before the ceremony. However, some ceremonies that only involve the bride and groom may have the flowers given to them during the ceremony in the following ways:

• taken from the Maid/Matron of Honor & the Best Man
• taken from the altar or ceremony area
• taken from a floral decoration
• taken from a special table set aside for the purpose
• taken from the ring bearer pillow
• taken from the flower girl
• taken from the mothers of the bride & groom
• taken from the officiant
• taken from the bride's bouquet

External Links & Sources

• Sample rose ceremony involving the officiant speaking only, from A Wedding Just For You.
• A lengthy rose ceremony involving vases, from The Association of Civil Marriage Celebrants of Victoria.
• Rose ceremony sample. Includes meaning of various colors of roses, from MarryU.
• A handfasting rose ceremony from Handfasting.info.
• First Unitarian Congregation of Ottawa: Notes on Pagan Weddings
• Civil Unions New Zealand: The Ceremony (click on "The Rose Ceremony" PDF link)

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